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Flow vs. Struggle

7/20/2016

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I have found myself feeling a lot of fear and lack of confidence surrounding my new teaching post. I still feel inadequately prepared, question my knowledge and abilities, and wonder about my ability to transition from public education attitude of "control" to "allowing" in these progressive-ed environs. A lot of this comes from comparing myself to the other Mentors, who are just so amazing and have so much education and training and experience. I feel so new at this, still, even after all of my teaching experience, and being in a classroom setting for more than 2 years now. Of course, I try to remember that I would not have been hired if they were not fully confident and convinced of my abilities and skills; the school is not "trying me out", all staff and directors want me there.

Working through this process has helped me realize that I can swim in the fear, thrashing against the current, or I can *CHOOSE* to welcome the challenges, adapt, go with the flow, and allow!

That is the route I've chosen. I'm going to do my best, learn, change, grow, ask for guidance and assistance, and remember that I am fully capable of being an excellent Mentor at this school. I'm turning over onto my back: to float, to flow with the current, to breathe deeply and relax, and to welcome and accept all the waves, currents, and tidal changes that will come this year. I'm going to take care of myself, nourish my body and heart, keep myself feeling secure and safe, and be so, so, so grateful that I am in a position of doing what I love and getting paid to do it. Not only that, this teaching post is going to stimulate and grow my creativity to a such a degree that my creative expression is just going to flow and flow and flow and know no bounds!
And while I'm welcoming the challenges and going with the flow, I will release all fears. Hey, I'm not afraid of sharks either, they can swim right alongside me!

My motto for the school year:

I welcome challenges and go with the flow!
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