coming soon!Salt intake: 2 tsp daily, first 10 days, then 1.5 tsp to the end of the fast. Continued with 1/2-1 tsp of salt daily during 2 week re-feeding.
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*In progress* while I complete videos and officially end this fast around 12pm today!592 hours fasted! Ending at Noon on Day 25! There is so much to cover in this post: how I feel, how I felt, what changed, etc. Look for a You Tube Videos soon that describes my transformational experience of fasting during these last 25 days! End of the evening, slightly hungry. But don't feel overfull or uncomfortable or have any GI upset from eating today. Between one cup of broth, one cup of soup divided into two meals, and soymilk and creamer in coffee and tea, macro totals equal: 755 kcals, 17 g. carbs, 24 g. protein, and 61 fat grams. Blood glucose was normal, and blood ketones stayed high, between 4.5-6.0.
Tomorrow, I might eat a little more and see how my stomach feels, but staying within my TRE of 12-6 pm. I'll continue monitoring glucose and ketones, out of curiousity. I want to stay in ketosis during my refeed. I keep having thoughts about breaking this fast. Today is Day 24. I feel fine--good in fact. More energy than I've had in a while, increased mental focus, positive attitude, mental and emotional changes and increased self-awareness... the only downer is repeated bouts of hunger and I haven't lost any weight in 5 days. As I consider the reasons WHY I might end the fast, I must also ponder the reasons why NOT to stop now. In serendipitous fashion, I opened my journal to some notes I made about cues and triggers related to habit cycles. Each time I give in to a cue/trigger, I reinforce the behavior, and it becomes a habit--whether eating to appease uncomfortable emotions, sitting instead of moving, watching a film to relax, eating when hungry, or any action that is not self-compassionate or nourishing or helpful. I realized, that if I give in to hunger during this longer fast, that I am reinforcing the "give-in" behavior for my next, short fast. From that, I determined that I need to finish this fast and reach my goal of 30 days to replace the old pattern of giving in to physical hunger cues immediately. During the last 7 days of this fast, I can learn to wait out the hunger, let it pass, without responding except by downing a glass of water. That action--and the refraining from the other action--will build my willpower so that I can successfully complete shorter ADFs; the fasts during which I have the most trouble remaining consistent! Thus, if I can resist the physical hunger cue, I will reinforce that resistance and create a new habit. The new habit will be a pause after the hunger sensation, I won't be a slave to that desire to eat. Yes, hunger is a valid physical cue for nutrition, but I'm referring to specific dysfunctional behavior related to that cue and the resultant behavior. I'm still learning that being hungry is "okay". Acting on this cue, and thus, reinforcing it, is the reason I have trouble with shorter fasts. I easily talk myself out of a fast because I'm hungry, which simply reinforces the quitting behavior.
Whether I make it to Day 30 or not, I will reach my Micro-goal of 25 days, which is tomorrow! What is significant is my mindset and self-awareness, and of course asking myself the question during these last 7 days: "How can I be kind to myself in this situation?". If fasting remains the kindest and most nourishing form of behavior, I will continue. Further, I want to be aware of what behaviors I wish to reinforce and strengthen in response to specific cues. I want to be in control of my hunger and my actions; not the other way around! My weight loss started stalling on me about two weeks ago. Prior to that I was averaging a 1.0-1.5 lb. loss per day. Granted, a lot of that was water, but my clothes were also getting more and more loos, so it was not only water! I began my fast on the eve of August 11, and lost 13 lbs. in 10 days. The following 7 days, from 21st, the weight loss creeped toward a total 2 lbs. These past 7 days, I've only lost 3 lbs. The number hovers within a 1-pound range for several day before the scale dips by another pound. Is this a reason to end my fast, which is currently a 23-day fast? NO!!!I've actually considered halting my fast, because I've started to get hungry again. Is hunger really relevant? Do I need to heed that call? Do I need to answer it? NO! For if I give in, then what will happen during my shorter IFs? I don't need to act on hunger each time it growls! And is the weight loss and body shrinkage the only consideration in my effort? NO!!Yesterday, I experienced some events that threw me off kilter, and I couldn't get back to center (equanimity). It was a learning experience: it ended beneficially, but still... I was in a mood all day. I acknowledge some fear and anxiety surrounding work; feelings that I need to slog through, but have managed to put off dealing with them (to an extent)--this is probably the major factor in my dis-ease that began over the weekend. Yesterday was just pure irritation and anger. Having a miniscule headache and looking at frozen scale numbers made me question why I would continue at this point. And yet, when I remembered the other reasons I am endeavoring toward longer fasts, such as emotional healing and spiritual growth, the desire to stop fasting disappeared! The numbers on the scale are not The End-All. Scale numbers that don't fall fast enough do NOT cancel out all the other gains I've made! My clothes continue to loosen, exercise sessions increase in frequency and duration, (in fact, yesterday, I envisioned myself running again, starting next week! Hurrah!), emotional epiphanies that lead to change continue to occur (just like this morning!), and I become kinder to myself as I begin to incorporate my self-reminder: "How can I be kind to myself in this situation?". I've epiphanied (hehehe) that my fasting journey is NOT a Zero-sum Game: if I do not lose weight, it does not cancel the effort, nor is it meaningless! The weight loss will continue, just as my fasting will continue in the form of shorter Intermittent Fasts, as a WOL (Way of Life), until I reach my goal. Then, as life evolves, so will my fasting regimen, which I plan to incorporate into my overall life plan for health and longevity. Fasting is not another diet, nor a temporary fix to a behavioral and relational problem with food and eating. I'll continue longer fasts in the appropriate season (not winter), and shorter, regular fasts into my weekly eating habits. Whether I need only overnight fasts of 18 hours, or TRE (Time-restricted Eating) of 6-8 hours, or regular ADFs (Alternate Daily Fasts) of only eating every other day-- I will figure that out when the time comes. In the meantime, I will continue this fast through to my 30-day goal (my micro-goal is 25 days in case I'm feeling meh), unless I feel ill or the fast becomes otherwise contraindicated. I'll recall my WHYs--reasons for fasting-- that transcend weight loss. I'll continue my victorious path. And lastly, I'll remember--hopefully in the future, as well--that I don't need to eat or break a fast to answer the grumbles of hunger. I no longer have to be the servant to that beckoning. Another lesson learned during fasting! Hunger comes in waves. Stress comes in waves. Bad times come in waves. Good times come in waves. = Life is like a wave! Another major epiphany I experienced during my fasting/inner work journey: I was practicing asana along with Yogaville's free livestream yoga classes
https://www.latest.facebook.com/events/246674883035538?acontext=%7B%22source%22%3A5%2C%22action_history%22%3A[%7B%22surface%22%3A%22page%22%2C%22mechanism%22%3A%22main_list%22%2C%22extra_data%22%3A%22%5C%22[]%5C%22%22%7D]%2C%22has_source%22%3Atrue%7D last night and I suddenly became aware that I had not RELEASED some of the pain I have felt. I have chronic rib pain from torn cartiledge between my ribs, caused by coughing for one month straight, due to bronchitis acquired in China from constant sinus and lung infections due to the poisonous air. That was a year-and-a-half ago! This came to my conscious mind during the relaxation! I need to actively and intentionally RELEASE that pain. Then, my mind went to other areas that I might be holding on, mentally, spiritually, physically, emotionally. I will begin to verbalize the release of those, too. Healing takes longer if you hang on to the cause, pain, etc. I want to work on releasing the pain and stress I experienced in China; the emotional trauma and causes from 2015-2017; the weight and fat I gained since 2017; the part in me that wants to numb and avoid painful emotions rather then feel them, acknowledge, accept, then let them go; the anger and rejection I feel from a certain family member; and the fear and anxiety I am currently experiencing around my return to teaching! https://www.yogaville.org/ Overall, I'm still feeling good. I've been really hungry though, the past few days. It is a weird sensation. Going on Day 3, I can determine that it is definitely hunger: my stomach growls and rumbles and I'm thinking of food. I'm going to buy some fast-breaker food in town today, just to be safe, but I'm determined to at least hang on through Friday, which will be 25 days. I'm also adding a few fats to my tea (coco oil or ghee), in small amounts, as it still gives me a bit of diarrhea. If needed, I'll double my broth intake to 2 cups per day. Then again, I'm reminding myself that: "It [hunger] doesn't matter, and I don't care {about the hunger]"! It's just a really odd sensation! Hunger dissipates withing the first 3-4 days of fasting for me, and if it does return, it's not enough to bother me. But yesterday, I felt hungry all day, to the point of distraction! And I woke up hungry today! Hmmm... I wonder if it's related to the anxiety and fear I am feeling about returning to teaching? Come to think of it, the hunger onset coincided with my awareness of the fear and anxiety! Double hmmm! I was going to do some writing on this topic yesterday, and kept procrastinating the task, becuase it will be very uncomfortable! Time to put away the laptop, stop avoiding the feelings, and sit with them, so I can let them go! Some supplements for refeeding from www.iherb.com . Enzymes to help increase stomach acid to improve digestion; postassium iodide to supplement both of those nutrients; and Chyawanprash for its Amla content, which is a bitter herb that tonifies digestion and has massive amounts of Vitamin C. Soap and body oil, too! I bought these products from https://www.nutrachamps.com/ , in the hopes they will help my hair regrow and grow thicker, stronger, and longer. I lost my hair by the handful my last few months in China, due to the stress of school. In July, it started coming out again in handfuls due to stress from drama here. They offer a money-back guarantee, so they are confident in their ethically-sourced product line! In the meantime, I'm working on my emotional resilience and mindfulness, so that my reaction to stress changes, and it affects me less harshly! Another major epiphany I experienced during my fasting/inner work journey: I was practicing asana along with Yogaville's free livestream yoga classes
https://www.latest.facebook.com/events/246674883035538?acontext=%7B%22source%22%3A5%2C%22action_history%22%3A[%7B%22surface%22%3A%22page%22%2C%22mechanism%22%3A%22main_list%22%2C%22extra_data%22%3A%22%5C%22[]%5C%22%22%7D]%2C%22has_source%22%3Atrue%7D last night and I suddenly became aware that I had not RELEASED some of the pain I have felt. I have chronic rib pain from torn cartiledge between my ribs, caused by coughing for one month straight, due to bronchitis acquired in China from constant sinus and lung infections due to the poisonous air. That was a year-and-a-half ago! This came to my conscious mind during the relaxation! I need to actively and intentionally RELEASE that pain. Then, my mind went to other areas that I might be holding on, mentally, spiritually, physically, emotionally. I will begin to verbalize the release of those, too. Healing takes longer if you hang on to the cause, pain, etc. I want to work on releasing the pain and stress I experienced in China; the emotional trauma and causes from 2015-2017; the weight and fat I gained since 2017; the part in me that wants to numb and avoid painful emotions rather then feel them, acknowledge, accept, then let them go; the anger and rejection I feel from a certain family member; and the fear and anxiety I am currently experiencing around my return to teaching! https://www.yogaville.org/ |
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