Once again, hearing exactly what I need to hear, having something profound reflected back to me... I was thinking throughout the day that I would do my best to sit with Swami Hamsananda today at lunch, so that I could glean more wisdom and continue my line of questioning from the talk on Saturday. The topics of our discussion ranged from a movie with Brendan Fraser, to her visits to the various Yogaville Ashrams around the world, fasting, traveling, and what I do for a living and abit about me. When I described what I do and how much I love it, and how I get to come here, her comment was: "It sounds like your life is perfect!" She continued with, "What do you need...do you need anything? It sounds like you don't." I answered that I need a more consistent practice because I "fall off the wagon", and get back on--though now I'm getting back on. "Why?", I need more discipline, but it is returning. "Well, that's good," she smiled!
She inquired about my comment of staying put for at least two years, before I move abroad again, and as to why I move around so much. I reminisced in a split second about always running away, and how that started very young, (in the literal sense of running away from home); how I have moved around so much since I was 17, never really grounding in one spot for too long. I explained how in my past most likely their was a subconscious reason for running or that I was running from/to something, but after much self-analysis, I now understand that the reason behind my sojourns is that I truly love to live in different countries, experience various cultures, and learn from those cultures; it broadens my view and opens my mind. She stated that I don't really need to think about two years yet, when I have Now and Now is good. She reminded me how lucky I am to have the freedom to live abroad because of the work I do. Yes!
My eyes filled with tears as she reflected back to me that yes, my life is perfect! As I acknowledged that realization and held it close, I felt so happy and full of gratitude. I felt grateful for the knowing, and I felt grateful to have someone to help me recognize it.
Really and truly, my life IS PERFECT: I have everything I need right NOW, I LOVE my work, I have transportation, I have money to visit Yogaville when I wish to, I have freedom to express my creativity at work, I'm running again and returning to radiant health, I have time and ability to express my creativity through drawing and writing and music, I have time and money to enjoy my favorite passé temps, my sense of security and grounding increases daily, I have returned to my "home" of yoga lifestyle and practice, my prosperity is increasing, my surroundings are Hygge and I feel good in my home space and life space, and ... it's all really perfect and I'm perfectly happy. I'm in that Space of Equanimity--Middle Way-- I have sought to create. My Light is shining again so that I can be a beacon to others and most especially, my students. I am fulfilled in offering my service to others. I am creating inner peace and happiness inside and in my world. I am living the Tao, satisfied in myself, without need to search for the answers outside myself or in another person. I am achieving my life purpose and it is good. I am so, so , so infinitely grateful!
... Loves to lie amongst the warm rays of sunshine and read, read, read, learn, learn, learn, and live, live, live, vicariously between the pages!