Day 202 - In General

I am grateful for this weird Texas weather. It's been wonderful to fall asleep to the sounds of rain and thunder, curled up cozy under warm blankets in cool night air. It is unusually cool for June in TX and I'm surprised how much I welcome the rain! I know a stifling summer is ahead, and since I'm not riding in it at noon, I'm no longer acclimated, but I have a small hope of hopes that this rain will continue throughout summer and we will have a jaw-droppingly cool summer of low 90s. That would make ATX a bit more bearable, LOL.
I am grateful for friends who remind me to work on acceptance and flow. I am amazed that some people are taught to accept the ups and downs and not fight agains what is occurring in life. Somewhere along the way, I learned the opposite, and so am having to unlearn a lifetime of struggle and fighting against What Is. I was both taught and conditioned that if you struggle and fight anything in life, if you are strong, you can overcome it. I have always been strong, and have always overcome all obstacles. But now, my strength wanes and I tire of the fight. I see that it is easier to float along with the current rather than stroke against it furiously--uselessly. Yet, my ingrained behavior pattern and mental processes initiate the Push Harder Reaction. I even struggle against that too, in irony: struggling against struggling. It's laughable. And, so I continue to unlearn and learn anew, undo and do over, and do again. I work (there it is again, but it does take an effort on my part) to accept rather than fight against whatever occurs. I seek wisdom that will help me remain on the path of going with the flow. I seek balance and ease and satisfaction.
I am grateful for the self-awareness that it takes to make changes in my behavior, thought processes, and emotions. I am grateful that I keep moving toward equanimity, in time, without struggle.